"D-"Rating by Robert W. Hammerle

M. Night Shyamalan's "The Happening" is not just a bad movie, it is a God awful one. It is as pretentious as it is boring, and it leaves no remaining doubt that this acclaimed director of "The Sixth Sense" (1999) has bottomed out.

Characters are so ludicrous and the dialogue so wooden that most of the people in the small audience that watched it with me at Glendale laughed repeatedly throughout this disaster. And that is not a good thing given the unfortunate fact that this movie is not a comedy.

While it is somewhat impossible to describe the incomprehensible plot, it seems to suggest that the plant kingdom is rebelling in a homicidal fashion against the environmental damage done to the world by mankind. While not an unworthy premise, Shyamalan's treatment of this otherwise serious subject makes his most recent disaster "Lady in the Water" (2006) look like an Oscar winner.

When you throw in Shyamalan's "The Village" (2004), I am at a loss to understand why credible actors would want to appear in his films. Yes, I know he struck a gusher with "The Sixth Sense." However, every movie since then has come up a dry hole. "Signs" (2002) had its moments until its silly, abysmal ending. But like the above mentioned "Village" and Lady in the Water", "The Happening" deserves to be on anyone's worst movie list for that given year.

Both Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel are fine actors, but you certainly couldn't tell it from watching this foolishness. They looked almost embarrassed throughout, a feeling largely shared by the audience.

To make matters worse, if indeed that is possible, Shyamalan's puerile depiction of average people in small town America is insulting. It is appalling the way he dismisses average people as little more than fools and bumpkins. There's a smugness to this movie that leaves you with the emotional feeling that someone has been dragging their fingernails on some high school blackboard.

Those of you who saw "Son of Rambow" were treated to a small, endearing story of middle school kids making an amateur film for submission in a contest. Suffice it to say that Mr. Shyamalan's "The Happening" is only slightly more stylish. As Lou Reed so famously said, "Stick a fork in him, he's done."