Today:
Posted: Oct 26, 2007 in Movies
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Was reading another post and it got me thinking about how some lines really stand out, regardless of how good the movie is. So let's hear what some of your favorites are. Give me the title and the quote:
Office Space: "Hi, Peter. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports."
Princess Bride: "So, you mean you'll put down your rock, and I'll put down my sword; and we'll try and kill each other like civilized people?"
Fight Club: "We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. "
From Roger Dodger:
Roger: You can't sell a product without first making people feel bad.
Nick: Why not? Roger: Because it's a substitution game. You have to remind them that they're missing something from their lives. Everyone's missing something, right?
Nick: I guess.
Roger: Trust me. And when they're feeling sufficiently incomplete, you convince them your product is the only thing that can fill the void. So instead of taking steps to deal with their lives, instead of working to root out the real reason for their misery, they go out and buy a stupid looking pair of cargo pants.
From My Big Fat Greek Wedding:
Aunt Voula: What do you mean he don't eat no meat? [the entire room stops, in shock] Oh, that's okay. I make lamb.
Take drugs danny? Everyday! Good, so what's the problem?
Blazing Saddles
Excuse me while I whip this out!
"Life is beautiful. Really it is. Full of beauty and illusions. Life is great. Without it, you'd be dead." - Gummo
In honor of the the Dalai Lama's upcoming and recent visits, I got to go with one of the classics. Carl Spackler from Caddy Shack:
"Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga"
And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
Peace
"Are you gonna eat your tots?" -Napoleon Dynamite
...I could go for some good tots.
Dazed and Confused: You know what I love about high school girls, I get older but they stay the same age, heh heh heh.
Okay...I'm going to start with Anchorman.
"You know, desire smells like that to some people."
Paul Rudd is the greatest.
"Have that removed" - Stripes
Striker: "Surely you can't be serious!" Rumack: "I am serious and don't call me Shirley." -- Ted Striker (Robert Hays) and Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielsen), Airplane! (1980)
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!" -- President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers), Dr. Strangelove (1964)
JohnScott, don't get me started on Airplane. "I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you."
A friend of mine in high school used to like to quote Airplane 2 also: "We don't have a tower. We only have a bridge."
Good call.
Zombieguy, can't believe you missed the obvious Romero quote: "When there's no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth." That was Indy native Ken Foree who said that (in both the original and remake!).
American Movie (I think) - "It's all right, It's ok. There's something to live for, Jesus told me so."
Superbad - "Samsies"
Drunken Master (first US release dub) - "Why so sexy?"
From Halloween: Laurie: "Was that the boogie man?" Dr. Loomis: "As a matter of fact, it was."
Silence of the Lambs: "It puts the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose again... it puts the lotion in the basket"
My name is Indigo Montoya. You kill my father. Prepare to die.
I have no idea why this one comes to mind, but this is a quote from a movie called "Funny Farm" when the movers are contemplating taking their truck across an old covered bridge.
"That's not a bridge, it's termites holding hands!"
I can't believe someone else has even HEARD of Gummo, let alone quoted it. Possibly one of the most disturbing movies I've ever seen due to its documentary style filming. Great Fight Club quote too!
Ha! I love Funny Farm. It was the beginning of Chevy Chase's fall from grace, but hey, gotta love it anyway.
"We ain't found $#!+!" - Spaceballs.
Also:
"Baby, please! I am not from Havana!" - Blazing Saddles
Zombieguy missed another obvious one - "Send more cops."
The chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something unusual. Bill Murray (Stripes)
They're coming to get you, Barbara! - Night of the Living Dead
Why is the floor wet Todd?! I don't know Margo!
From Christmas Vacation...when the frozen ice from the gutter went through the neighbors home and melted.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: We can't stop here! This is bat country!
"Like anyone could ever know that Napoleon."
First Jive Dude: Sh-- man, that h---- mus' be messin' my old lady... got to be runnin' cold upside down his head. You know?
Second Jive Dude: Hey home, I can dig it. You know he ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap up on you man.
First Jive Dude: I say hey sky, s'other s'ay I wan say? Second Jive Dude: UH...
First Jive Dude: Pray to J I get the same ol' same ol'.
Second Jive Dude: Eh. Yo knock yourself a pro slick, gray matter live performas down now take TCB'in man.
First Jive Dude: Hey, you know what they say... See a broad, to get that booty yak 'em.
First Jive Dude, Second Jive Dude: Leg 'er down 'n smack 'em yak 'em!
First Jive Dude: Cold got to be. You know? Shiiiiit.
"I must break you" (Rocky IV)
How about the classic, timeless, beaten-into-the-ground and muffled by gunshot "Yippeekay aye, mother f---er"?
Dazed and Confused: You know what I love about high school girls, I get older ...
Another from Dazed and Confused "Wipe the face off your head, B*tch!" --Parker Posey as "Darla"
Don't know why exactly but a few quotes of one of my favorite American Movies comes to mind. The brilliant and honest evaluation of the human's mind and ego in a fictional way in "The Devil's Advocate":
John Milton: Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do, I swear for His own amusement, his own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, f---in' ass off! He's a tight-ass! He's a SADIST! He's an absentee landlord! Worship that? NEVER!
MILTON: Because the law, my boy, puts us into everything. It's the ultimate backstage pass, it's the new priesthood, baby.
MILTON: Free will. It's like butterfly wings.Once touched, they never get off the ground. Free will - it is a bitch.
LOMAX: What about love? MILTON: Overrate. Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate.
(and my all time favorite) MILTON: Vanity - definitely my favorite sin.
Also from Silence of the Lambs: "You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes?"
"Hungry?" -- last line of "Big Night," followed by an incredibly moving scene with no dialogue as one brother makes breakfast for the other plus another restaurant worker. Astonishingly effective!
Nothing is over! Nothing! You just don't turn it off! It wasn't my war! You asked me, I didn't ask you! And I did what I had to do to win! But somebody wouldn't let us win! And I come back to the world and I see all those maggots at the airport, protesting me, spitting. Calling me baby killer and all kinds of vile crap! Who are they to protest me? Who are they? Unless they've been me and been there and know what the hell they're yelling about! - First Blood (1982)
Or here's another from the same movie: "You don't seem to want to accept the fact you're dealing with an expert in guerrilla warfare, with a man who's the best, with guns, with knives, with his bare hands. A man who's been trained to ignore pain, ignore weather, to live off the land, to eat things that would make a billy goat puke. In Vietnam his job was to dispose of enemy personnel. To kill! Period! Win by attrition. Well Rambo was the best." - Col. Trautman
Do we have clearence clarence? Roger roger. Whats the vector voctor.
Comb the desert! Man we been combin all day, and we aint found sh*t!
Predator --
"Run !! Go!! .... Get to da Choppa" - Arnold
"There's something out there huntin us, and it ain't no man. We're all gonna die" - Jesse Ventura
"But my lips are chapped real bad!" (Napoleon Dynamite)
"You woke the bears. How could you?!" (Anchorman)
"Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. Nobody!" (Dodgeball)
Anything from Mel Brooks...
"Keep firing @$$holes!" (Spaceballs)
Hey Griswold, where are you going to put a tree that big.
Bend over and I'll show you!
You got a lot of nerve talking to me like that.
I wasn't talking to you.
Christmas Vacation
Hey Griswold, where are you going to put a tree that big. Bend over and ...
Ooooh. Good one. That's also one of my faves.
Man, Christmas Vacation is a quote repository.
A couple more of the best:
"Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, d---less, hopeless, heartless, fat-a--, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey s--- he is. Hallelujah. Holy s---. Where's the Tylenol?"
Then, Clark talking to Mr. Shirley's lackies as they walk by him at the beginning:
"Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, kiss my a--, kiss his a--, kiss your a--. Happy Hanukkah."
I never get tired of quoting Gary Oldman from TRUE ROMANCE:
"He must have thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?"
or
"They got everything here from a diddled-eyed joe to damned if I know. "
Which of course is recycled from RESERVOIR DOGS, but you can't beat Oldman's delivery in TRUE ROMANCE. And Bronson Pinchot has never been funnier:
"Hi. How are you? My name's Elliot, and I'm with the Cub Scouts of America. We're... we're selling uncut cocaine to get to the jamboree. "
I love TRUE ROMANCE even more than PULP FICTION.
"Do, or do not. There is no try." Yoda in The Empire Strikes Back
"Seven schools in seven years and the only thing different is my locker combination. Our love is God. Let's go get a slushie." J.D. (Christian Slater) in Heathers
"My old man is a television repairman, he's got this ultimate set of tools. I can fix it." Jeff Spicoli (Fast Times at Ridgemont High).
"It's supposed to be hard! If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great!" One of my all time favs, from A League of Their Own. When Jimmy is talking to Dottie, wehn she tells him she wants to quit the team.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning. It smells like.........victory
Silverado - "I don't wanna kill you and you don't wanna be dead"
I know it was you Fredo. You broke my heart. You broke my heart! - Godfather II (1974)
"Your mother's an astronaut"-White Men Can't Jump
Except for John Scott's lone entry, we've seriously neglected Office Space here.
"PC Load Letter. What the f**k's that mean?"
"Well, I wouldn't say I've been missing it" (in response to "you've been missing a lot of work lately, Peter."
"The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care. " Peter Gibbons - Office Space
"I'll say it. I'm a Michael Bolton fan. For my money it doesn't get any better than when he sings 'When a Man Loves a Woman.'"
"It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my ass off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see another dime; so where's the motivation? And here's something else, Bob: I have eight different bosses right now." Peter Gibbons - Office Space
"And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire..." Milton - Office Space
"What we've got here is... failure to communicate. Some men you just can't reach. So you get what we had here last week, which is the way he wants it... well, he gets it. I don't like it any more than you men." Warden from Cool Hand Luke (1967)
"I don't remember graduating, and my first sexual experience I don't remember that either, but man I will never, ever forget the first time I smoked that sweet, sweet cheeba!"
"I think he said his name is Ralph." - Cheech, Up in Smoke
"I think he said his name is Ralph." - Cheech, Up in Smoke
theres a ton of quotes in that flick!
"You wanna be president? Lemme tell you the first rule of politics; Always know if the juice is worth the squeeze. You know what that means? It means you don't steal my girl unless you're ready to accept the consequences." - Kelly from The Girl Next Door (2004)
"That smells like...a used diaper full of Indian food." "It smells like bigfoot's d---!"
"That smells like...a used diaper full of Indian food." "It smells like bigfoot's d---!"
Brian Fantana: You know, desire smells like that to some people.
"It's called Sex Panther, by Odion. It's illegal in 9 contries. Yep it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good."
OMG...look at what I started. Let's get off the Sex Panther, even though 60% of the time it works...every time.
"What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing. How 'bout we get you in your p.j.'s and we hit the hay?"
Anchorman is arguably the most quotable movie ever! "You're a dirty hooker and I want to slap you in public!"
You have man boobs.
"I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly... "
"You are a smelly pirate hooker!"
"They're OR scrubs."
"Oh, are they?" (From "Rushmore," but you should already know that.)
"King Kong ain't got nothing on me!" Denzel Washington in "Training Day."
"I'm not skating to anything with references to lady humps. I don't even know what that means." "No one knows what it means but it's provocative."
"I'm gonna punch you in the ovary. A straight shot right to the babymaker."
Ah, "Blades of Glory"..."Say you want a snowBONE!"
You have a dirty whorish mouth.
I can't believe no one has stepped up with the Pootie Tang quotes yet.
"See, my damie, Pootie Tang don't wa-da-tah to the shama cow... 'cause thats a cama cama leepa-chaiii, dig?" - Pootie Tang
Or this one from Pootie Tang: "Pootie Tang will draw you a picture of how he gonna kick your ass, then mail it to you ten days in advance. The picture gets there right? You're goin', "What the hell is this?" and then Pootie Tang knocks on your door, promptly kicks your ass and you still won't know what happened to you!" - J.B.
Or this one from Pootie Tang: "Pootie Tang will draw you a picture of how ...
"Not the tippy tise!"
Or one of the other Best-Worst Movies ever (and a personal favorite I confess) The Ladies Man: "Ya know, when a man works hard his entire life enduring hundreds of ladies, many of whom he does not even remember, you'd like to think that at the end of the day he will be given a lot of money, without having had to earn it." - Leon Phelps
And another Leon Phelps gem: "Listen, I was wandering. Can I ask you a question? Uh... was your father a meat burgler? Here's why I ask: because it looks like somebody stole two fine hams and shoved them down the back of your dress."
"Why don't you just make 10 louder, and make 10 be the top number, and make that a little louder?" "These go to 11."
Braden, how could you overlook Biggie Shortie's gem from "Pooty Tang": Just 'cause a girl like to dress fancy and stand on the street corner near some w----s, you automatically think she's hookin'?
Sabatay.
"What the hell am I lookin at? When does this happen in the movie?" "Now. You're looking at now Sir. Everything that happens now, is happening now." "What happened to then?" "We past it." "When?" "Just now. We're at now now." "Go back to then." "When?" "Now." "Now?" "Now!" "I can't." "Why?" "We missed it." "When?" "Just now." "When will then be now?" "Soon." "How soon?" "Sir!" "What?" "We've identified their location." "Where?" "It's the Moon of Vega" "Good work set a course and prepare for our arrival." "When?" "1900 hours Sir." "By high noon tomorrow they will be our prisoners." "Who!"
Braden, how could you overlook Biggie Shortie's gem from "Pooty Tang": Just 'cause a girl ...
Well played Taffy. For that: "Baby, I'm going to sine your pitty on the runny kine!" - Pootie
Anything from Blades Of Glory, Napoleon Dynamite, or Dumb and Dumber...
From Sid and Nancy....."SIIIID!! WHAT ABOUT THE FAREWELL DRUGS????"....
"Worrying is like a rocking chair it gives you something to do, but doesn't get you anywhere".- Van Wilder
Cap'n Jack Sparrow... P o t C- "I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest... Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid."
and of course... nearly anything from the genius timing of chevy chase...
SECRETARY: I'm sorry, who are you again? FLETCH: I'm Frieda's boss. SECRETARY: Who's Frieda? FLETCH: My secretary.
"Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" Bluto - Animal House (1979)
"I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries." French solder from Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
"I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough ...
I'm not dead yet! Don't get me started on Monty Python
"I do have a test today. that wasn't bulls---. It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European. So who cares if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car. Not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon, "I don't believe in The Beatles, I just believe in me." Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people. " Matthew Broderick from the cult classic "Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
"I imagine that right now you're feeling a bit like Alice, tumbling down the rabbit hole." The Matrix (1999)
Chris Rock as a mosquito turned lawyer in The Bee Movie, "I was already a blood-sucking parasite, all I needed was a briefcase."
"Funny, she doesn't look Druish"; "No, Barf, that's my name! I'm a mog", and "She's gone from 'Suck' to 'Blow'"
God love Spaceballs!!!!
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee." Samuel Jackson (Jules) from Pulp Fiction (1994)
"So, I'm tendin' bar there at Ecklund and Swedlin's last Tuesday and this little guy's drinkin' and he says, "So where can a guy find some action? I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." And I says, "What kinda action?" and he says, "Woman action, what do I look like?" And I says, "Well, what do I look like, I don't arrange that kinda thing," and he says, "I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake," and I says, "Well, this ain't that kinda place...So he says, "So I get it, so you think I'm some kinda jerk for askin'," only he doesn't use the word jerk...And then he calls me a jerk and says the last guy who thought he was a jerk was dead now. So I don't say nothin' and he says, "What do ya think about that?" So I says, "Well, that don't sound like too good a deal for him then...And he says, "Yah, that guy's dead and I don't mean of old age." And then he says, "Geez, I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake."
Hope I get this right, I should have wrote it down "When you love someone, it's hurts when you can't see them anymore." John Cusak - Martian Child. I instantly thought of a friend now suddenly gone.
"I'll have what she's having." From the diner scene in 'When Harry Met Sally' where Meg Ryan fakes an orgasm.
Peter: What should we write... I have a big weiner?
Robby: I want to poop back and forth.
Peter: What? What does that mean?
Robby: Like I'll poop into HER butthole and she'll poop it back... into my butthole. And then we'll just keep doing it back and forth. With the same poop. Forever.
From "Me, You, and Everyone We Know". The kids deliver the lines perfectly. I laughed until I was in tears. Look it up on YouTube. You won't be disappointed.
Goodfellas: "Paulie had this system for slicing the garlic. He'd use a razor blade and slice it so thin, it would liquify in the pan..." Henry Hill (Ray Liotta) narrating
Party Monster: "I'm not addicted to drugs, I'm addicted to glamour." James St. James (Seth Green)
A Christmas Story: 2 of Ralphie's Best- "I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle." "THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word."
"I'm like the Crypt Keeper!" Freaky Friday www.youtube.com/watch?v=UShtvCen6So
"You're Killin me Smalls..." From none other than 'The Sandlot'
something you hear a great deal of in the filmworld
(taken from the greatest film EVER...Ed Wood)
"We don't have a permit. Run!" and of course
So, what was the important news you couldn't tell me on the phone, again? Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Well, I started thinking about what you were saying about how your movies need to make a profit. Now, what is the one thing, if you put it in a movie, it'll be successful? Georgie Weiss: Tits! @ Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, better than that. A star. Georgie Weiss: you must have me confused with David Selznick. I don't make major motion pictures; I make crap. Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes, but if you take that crap and put a star in it, then you've got something. Georgie Weiss: Yeah. Crap with a star.
from the Monster Squad
E.J.: Hey Fat Kid! Good job. Horace: My name... is Horace! @
Horace: Wolfman's got nards!
From Trainspotting:
RENTON: I hate being Scottish. We're the lowest of the f------ low, the scum of the earth, the most wretched, servile, miserable, pathetic trash that was ever shat into civilization. Some people hate the English, but I don't. They're just wankers. We, on the other hand, are colonized by wankers. We can't even pick a decent culture to be colonized by. We are ruled by effete a-------s. It's a s---e state of affairs and all the fresh air in the world will not make any f------ difference.
Oh and from the timeless Shawshank...
"Get busy living or get busy dying"
Minister: As I was saying, Alex, you can be instrumental in changing the public verdict. Do you understand, Alex? Have I made myself clear?
Alex: As an unmuddied lake, Fred. As clear as an azure sky of deepest summer. You can rely on me, Fred.
or:
Alex: It had been a wonderful evening and what I needed now, to give it the perfect ending, was a little of the Ludwig Van.
-- A Clockwork Orange
Billy Mitchell: "No matter what I say, it draws controversy. It's sort of like the abortion issue."
"Damn it, Neil, the name is Nuwanda." from Dead Poets Society.
Jess: Marriages don't break up on account of infidelity. It's just a symptom that something else is wrong.
Harry Burns: Oh really? Well, that "symptom" is f--ing my wife.
or
Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
-When Harry Met Sally
Walt: Daddy what's gradual school?
T. S. Garp: What?
Walt: Gradual school. Mommy say's she teaches at gradual school.
T. S. Garp: Oh Gradual school is where you go to school and you gradually find out you don't want to go to school anymore.
The World According to Garp
"What the hell am I lookin at? When does this happen in the movie?" "Now. ...
Now if you can quote, Mel Brooks. You know good movies.
Here's another.
Marcus Vindictus: Don't you know your right flank from your left flank?
Captain Mucus: I'm sorry sir, I flunked flank.
Marcus Vindictus: You flunked flank? Get the flunk out of here!
Just Because I didn't see it yet. Yes, I admit, highly over used.
Tony Montana( Scarface) "Ok you wanna play rough? Say hello to my little friend!" "All I got in this world is my balls and my word, and I dont break them for anyone." "Its ok. its ok, another qualude she love me again in the morning."
"I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass.... and I'm all out of bubble gum."
-They Live
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=peZuXrxGP3M
"No offense to Michael McDonald or anything, but if I hear 'Yamo be there' one more time.. Yamo gonna burn this place to the ground" - 40 Year Old Virgin
"I don't want you to be the guy in the PG-13 movie where everyone really hopes makes it happen, I want you to be the guy in the rated R movie. The guy you're not really sure you like yet"- Swingers
Milton Waddams: Excuse me? Excuse me, senor? May I speak to you please? I asked for a mai tai, and they brought me a pina colada, and I said no salt, NO salt for the margarita, but it had salt on it, big grains of salt, floating in the glass...
Mexican Waiter: Lo siento mucho, senor.
[Under his breath] Mexican Waiter: Pinche gringo.
Milton Waddams: [as the waiter walks away] And yes, I won't be leaving a tip, 'cause I could... I could shut this whole resort down. Sir? I'll take my traveler's checks to a competing resort. I could write a letter to your board of tourism and I could have this place condemned. I could put... I could put... strychnine in the guacamole. There was salt on the glass, BIG grains of salt.
Phone's ringing, Dude.
Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't get in a car, I don't f------ ride in a car, I don't pick up the phone, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as s--- don't f------ roll! Shomer Shabbos!
Donny, you're out of your element!
You can never have too much Lebowski.
There's a lot of things about me that you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand. You don't want to get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel.
I cant believe no one thought of this one: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective "If I'm not back in five minutes... wait longer!"
Classic
Devil's Rejects- "What's wrong, you don't find me funny, you don't think clowns are f---'n funny?!"
Jon Lovitz as Andy in the very disturbingly funny 'Happiness' :
"You think I don't appreciate art? You think I don't understand fashion? You think I'm not hip? You think I'm pathetic? A nerd? A lard-ass fat-so? You think I'm s---? Well, you're wrong, 'cause i'm champagne, and you're s---. Until the day you die, you, not me, will always be s---."
While saving specific comments for my upcoming review of the movie, "Charlie Wilson's War" has many quotable lines, especially from Philip Seymour Hoffman.
In The Life Of Reilly, Charles Nelson Reilly talks of Hal Holbrook's beginnings and struggles with Mark Twain Tonight back when he carried his props in a grocery bag.
He said, "If you want to get ahead, get a bag. Get a bag and drop a dream into it."
"Well, I believe in the soul, the c---, the p----, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days." Crash Davis (Kevin Costner) in Bull Durham 1988
Easy Rider... George Hanson: You know, this used to be a helluva good country. I can't understand what's gone wrong with it.
Billy: Man, everybody got chicken, that's what happened. Hey, we can't even get into like, a second-rate hotel, I mean, a second-rate motel, you dig? They think we're gonna cut their throat or somethin'. They're scared, man.
George Hanson: They're not scared of you. They're scared of what you represent to 'em.
Billy: Hey, man. All we represent to them, man, is somebody who needs a haircut.
George Hanson: Oh, no. What you represent to them is freedom.
Billy: What the hell is wrong with freedom? That's what it's all about.
George Hanson: Oh, yeah, that's right. That's what's it's all about, all right. But talkin' about it and bein' it, that's two different things. I mean, it's real hard to be free when you are bought and sold in the marketplace. Of course, don't ever tell anybody that they're not free, 'cause then they're gonna get real busy killin' and maimin' to prove to you that they are. Oh, yeah, they're gonna talk to you, and talk to you, and talk to you about individual freedom. But they see a free individual, it's gonna scare 'em.
Billy: Well, it don't make 'em runnin' scared.
George Hanson: No, it makes 'em dangerous. Buh, neh! Neh! Neh! Neh! Swamp!
"Hey, I'm walkin' here!" Midnight Cowboy "My daddy does oil and everything that implies." Urban Cowboy