Indy.com
Today:
Party Smarter: 10 Things NOT to ask a DJ
First, Let me start by saying that I am very grateful for all DJ'ing has done for me. I just wanted to inform people of things that are the bane of every DJ's event:
1) "Can You Play Something Good, You Know.... Something I can Dance To?" Reply.... "Um, What's wrong with James Brown/ Michael Jackson/ Top 40 Flavor of the Month, that I am currently playing?" I mean it's not like I'm in the club dropping Mars Volta!?!
2) "Can you play something with a Beat" reply - Blank Stare
3) "Can You play some(insert genre)?" Always give the DJ a specific song, or at least an artist! and NEVER try to sing it to him cuz you "Don't know the words"
4) "Do you got a pen I can borrow" - Does your favorited dj look like they have time to find a pen so you can go get some gir/guy's number and/or give your's out? they have about 1 minute to get the next song cued and Most DJ's don't keep pens in the booth. Oh, and by the way They got cellphones for that now!
5) This one is for my regulars - I know what songs are "your songs" I even wait till you get there before I play them. So PLEASE do not come up and remind me 25 times to play "your song/artist", I PROMISE your time will come.
6) "Can you play ...... I'm getting ready to leave. Such and Such is meeting us at (insert bar name here) and I really wanna hear it!" - Um, NO -Your favorite DJ is not playing your song, or will make you wait at least twenty minutes. I mean, if they are YOUR friends, shouldn't they come meet you at a club where the dj is going to play the music you WANT to hear? Or are you gonna go dance to Brown Eyed Girl and/or Humpty Dance? If you tell me you are leaving, I assume you have already left and if the song you were requesting does not fit the set that I am in, I am NOT changing my set just so you can leave as soon as the song is on!
7) This is for the DJ's "Friends"- Please don't text your DJ Friend and ask him how it is looking (unless you own the club), If you are too lazy to come and support your DJ "Friend" then you don't really want to know. Most DJ's send out Email Invites, Text Blasts, and are even advertised in our local Entertainment Guides, so if you want to support, then get out there and support, more than likely said DJ "Friend" can get you in Free or at a reduced cover and even help you with some drinks, so if your low on dough, don't sweat it, after all isn't that what "Friends" are for?
8) With global warming and all this doesn't seem to be much of an issue anymore, but I gotta say it! "Can you hold my coat/Purse/phone?" Ummmm, If I REALLY know you, ie you know my mom's name, what my favorite restaurants are, then just stash your stuff. If you don't know my name, then go see Alicia Keys, she's in the coat check!
9) "Can you teach me how to DJ?" Ummm, does this look like kindergarten? IT'S A NIGHTCLUB!!! Listen pretty girl (it invariably is)If you REALLY want to learn how to DJ, buy some turntables, cop a mixer, get some RECORDS (yes, start with RECORDS), and invite me over for lunch, dinner,.... and breakfast! Seriously though, get the equipment and watch to learn, help carry equipment/records for your favorite DJ, we always need help but never like asking (I always say that I play music for free, I get paid to carry the equipment) and the fact that you show interest in the dirty part of the job instead of the "fun" part will show your DJ friend that you are serious!
10) Do I really need a tenth thing NOT to ask a DJ? How about a few things you SHOULD ask your favorite DJ:
Need a Drink? (if they don't drink alcohol get em a BOTTLED water or their preferred stimulant ie Red Bull)
Need Some Help? (Especially at the end of the night, every body helps coming in, but when it's time to pack up, Adios!)
Take the time to write down your request/dedication/shoutout. As soon as you ask me for your request and walk away, I have forgotten what you have asked for, don't let this anger you and instead of coming up to the dj booth every 5 minutes just write it down for your DJ.
Take the time to think of what the dj is playing and what would go with it and/or the set that he is playing. It is true magic when a customer comes up and requests something that would go perfect with what you are playing, or the request is actually the next song you have planned!
If you tip, tip BIG, but don't offer to pay a dj to play a song. ONLY tip if you REALLY had fun and show that gratitude in Jacksons!
Thanks for reading this, I want everyone to understand that I realize that most people in the club are well adjusted folks that really don't care what the dj are doing, this is to ensure that folks like yourselves effectively use your time in dealing with the dj. After all, who wants to be cramped in the smallest, hottest room in a club talking to the sweatiest person in the room? Sincerely,
DJ Indiana Jones
LMAO!!!!! How true my brotha! Ahhh, my fave is the drunk guy who wants to ruin a dance set with some old school country. Or drunk frat boy with hard rock. Thanks to the laptop i can drop their song in the player, then everytime they come up and ask "Where's that Metallica?" I just show em its loaded and make sure it never gets played.
Amen. Glad I found you on here too!
Is is ok to ask the DJ to play The Conga? Is it EVER ok to play The Conga?
I'm getting nostalgic now. Here is another one I heard all too often in my "DJing days", and of course my typical witty response.
"Hey man, what have you got?"
"Music, and plenty of it. What are you looking to hear?"
"I dunno....can I look through your CD's?"
"Sure thing. Just hand over your purse/wallet first and let me rifle through that to see what you have, fair enough?"
"NO WAY!! I aint lettin' you look through my stuff!"
"And neither will I allow you look through mine!"
"Your an a&%$e!! You don't know who I am, do you?"
"Actually, I do know who you are! Your the drunk who I am not taking any requests from and who also will be escorted out the front door by Security in about 30 seconds unless you zip it and walk away. The bar is that way and I hope you have a spectacular evening! Cheers!"
LMAO! I love the people who like to tell you that they're so "important". Too funny. Get alot of "I used to be a dj" guy also. Or the people who got "the hook-up" on equipment, or know artists and can get their songs before they come out. Alcohol rules!
Thanks for the heads up...let me know how to get the answer to some of these questions before I bump into you at the club....LOL!!! My question is how to get some LOCAL independent artists in the city's music in rotation while you're at the club....eveybody knows that new records are broke in the clubs...let me know if you need something that will keep the dance floor crowded and dancing....never to miss a beat!!! Look forward to working with you!
you can email me mp3's to djindianajones@gmail.com, i will be happy to give you feedback and if I am feeling it I will play it in the club. I have been playing local artists in the club and on the radio for over 15 years, but it's gotta be hot!
Bahaha. DJ Indiana Jones holding it DOWN.
AMEN. PREACH ON!
Alex B
I know Alex can feel me! The Response has been so good that you gotta watch out this weekend for Party Smarter: Bottle/VIP Service Tips and Ettiquette!
holler jones
This is funny.
What about the theme to 'Titanic'? Is it ok to as the DJ to play the theme to 'Titanic'?
Where will you be Saturday so I can ask you #1, #2, and #7??? I'm just playing. That was funny though!!!! Think I'll just stick to my seat or the dance floor!!!
My man, you have written the most important document known to Dj's. It is the 10 Commandments of Dj's! Should be carved in stone or something, hmmm maybe u should grow a really long beard......
Jones You are Hilarious, This SH*t is So True! Party Goers read this and Read it well... Maybe even print it out and bring a copy to the club so you can remember when you are drunk! HaHa.
Wow! At one time or another I think I've done ALL of those! Fortunately, I was always in a third world country where the DJ's equipment was made of bamboo and sewing needles. Oh... except I've never done #7. I don't know how to text.
When I used to spin down in Tallahassee, I used to play house and drum and bass sets for several weekly themed nights. My two points of contentions were this:
A drunk ass chick dancing up on or around the stage making a completely uncalled for level of vibration (or even worse, bumping the table that holds my decks).
Some jerk who comes to a house party or drum and bass night and then requests something like Aerosmith or NWA. I like other styles of music too, but if you come out to a drum and bass night, don't expect the other 200 dancers in the room to be okay with a sudden switch to a genre that is at least 80 BPM slower than your mix.
A CLOSE THIRD: