Having a 30 minute drive each way to work gives me a lot of time to think and assemble my thoughts for future rants and blogs. So in no certain order are things that catch my eye, get my goat or maybe, yes maybe, piss me off while I am on the road.

Nothing makes me more nervous than the dumbasses that walk from their car that’s at the gas pump to the inside of the store with a lit cigarette in their mouth. All so they can get those last puffs and then throw the cig to the ground. HELLO! Gas pumps! Major Fumes!

And when you decide you are going to buy scratch off lottery tickets can you take less time to browse and better yet, not take so long when it is rush hour and people are trying to get to and from work? When you do get the tickets, please don’t set up shop like you are at a bingo hall and start scratching tickets looking for that “big prize”. Take them back to your pickup truck or minivan or whatever you drove in on and then return to hold up the line again cashing in that $2 winner after you spent damn near $20 in the first place.

Why do people have to have that “gangsta lean” when they are driving. There are enough idiots on the road as it is without some jackass that can’t see over the dashboard driving around THINKING he is looking cool. If I was not scared of getting shot, I would walk up to these clowns at a stoplight in my best Eminem impression and say “yo dog, why don’t you sit up straight” but, there are way too many wack jobs in this city to be pulling’ that stunt.

For those of you mini-driving moms that decide you wanna discipline the kids while driving, please pull the vehicle over and handle your business. When you are trying to turn around and yell at the brats, it makes you drive slower therefore holding up where I need to be. Most importantly, they will not take you serious if the van is still moving and are probably paying too much attention to the DVD you thought would stop them from acting up in the first place. Shut the DVD off, pull the van over, and whip that ass!

And when you end up in the McDonalds drive thru, how much time does it take to order a bunch of happy meals for the kids? Seems pretty simple I would think? Count the kids, place the order, order for yourself unless your new-age diet prevents you from doing so, and pull around. Unless your child has some life threatening food allergy, order the food as it is. When I was growing up I would tell my parents what I did not want on my sandwich and I would hear “just pick it off”. If more people were like that when I am behind them in the drive thru, my fatass would get my double ¼ pounder, jumbo sized meal a lot quicker than I do.

Maybe if there was a safe and legal way to do shots when I drive or medicate before taking to the roadways, I would be less of a dick.

I again promise I am not an angry person, I like making people laugh and hopefully I just did..