Again, I start this blog with a profession of how cool and laid back I really am… I’m like the LAST person to judge someone for anything…

- BUT! -

Last night I attended a function to which I was an INVITED GUEST, at a local establishment (which shall remain nameless). And since the place is small quaint, I sat at the first seats available, the bar, with my friend.

Next thing I know, here comes Johnny-Smoke-A-Lot with his nicotine gun who plops himself right down next to me with my asthmatic self. Still… I don’t say a word. No problem. I turn my back the other way and talk to my friend. That is, until Mr. Smoke ’Em Dead decided to direct his rat-poisoned exhale in my direction.

Sidebar: Did you know secondhand smoke kills? I thought I heard that somewhere recently…

Politely I asked him if he could move his ashtray and exhale in the opposite direction. Irritatedly, he agreed. Moments later the smoke again invaded my drink and lungs as he’d repositioned himself to my side. Again, I politely asked him to help a sistah out and redirect his smoke. I even explained my asthma sitro! This time he got an attitude… (insert OH NO HE DIDN’T here).

I almost opened up a can of whoopazz on him, but my friends suddenly got tired and insisted we leave there. What a jerk!

Wait. There’s more…

So the next spot I attended last night was one of my weekly salsa fixes. I went there to dance and have dinner. Salsa = dancing. Dancing = cardio activity. Cardio = the need to breathe!

Can someone tell me why Suzy Smokemistress lit up a cigarette RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME WHILE I WAS EATING?!?!?! EEEEEWWW – GWOSS. Oh, now I was pissed!

She blew that smoke right in the air above my head and it all fell right onto my salad! Excuse me waitress, I didn’t order a smoked Greek salad.

Again, my friends who could see I was almost incensed got suddenly tired and wanted to leave. But I wasn’t finished eating. This chick KEPT ON puff-puffing and blowing her lung-killer right into my face. I choked. Gasped. OVER-REACTED, even… all just to show her that I was not feelin’ her smoke.

So single-file my friendys headed toward the door. Another event ruined for the night all due to the nicotine crackhead.

****Gets on soapbox****

Personally, I don’t care if people smoke. It’s a personal choice to stink up your hair, your clothes and black out your lungs. But does your personal choice have to freakin KILL ME?!?!? Dayum!

We all have to share this world. Can we get some smoker’s etiquette up in the mug, please? Is there a halfway point between your fix and my funeral?!?!? Jeezus.

Your thoughts?